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Recommended Books to Read

Books preceded by prices can be purchased from Friends of the Court, Inc. during your Divorcing Parents Class or by calling (208) 384-0977.

Pre-schoolers:

($5) The Dinosaur's Divorce by Laureen K. Brown & Marc Brown; Little Brown, 1986
Reassures children of all ages about why parents divorce, what happens to children, having two homes, celebrating holidays, telling their friends, and living with or having stepparents, stepsisters, and stepbrothers. Children may want to have it read to them over and over.
 
Divorce is a Grown up Problem by Janet Sinberg; Avon Publishers, 1978
A lap book for children of all ages. Warm, friendly illustrations show and tell it isn't your child's fault, you still love him/her, healthy ways to handle anger, how your child is still safe and secure because the parents are in firm control of his/her world.
 
Let's Talk About It: Divorce by Fred Rogers; G P Putnam & Sons, 1996
For children of all ages . . . helpful information from the man children have come to trust.

School-aged Children:

At Daddy's on Saturdays by Linda W. Girard; Albert Whitman & Co., 1987
Katie's daddy moves out when he and her mommy get divorced. Katie is angry, sad, and very afraid her daddy will never come back. Katie learns that even though her parents can't live together anymore, they both still love her, and will always be her mommy and daddy.
 
Break-up by Gianni Padoan; Childs Play, 1987
When Joe's dad leaves home, it is the worst day of his life. As he realizes both his parents still love him, he is more able to adjust to the new reality.
 
($5) The Dinosaur's Divorce by Laureen K. Brown & Marc Brown; Little Brown, 1986
Reassures children of all ages about why parents divorce, what happens to children, having two homes, celebrating holidays, telling their friends, and living with or having stepparents, stepsisters, and stepbrothers. Children may want to have it read to them over and over.
 
($10) Divorced but Still My Parents by Shirley Thomas and Dorothy Rankin
A helping book about divorce for children and parents. Includes a story about a kitten whose parents get a divorce, some explanations for children about what happens during a divorce, and workbook-type activities for children to do that will help them deal with their thoughts and feelings about the divorce.
 
Divorce Is a Grown up Problem by Janet Sinberg; Avon Publishers, 1978
A lap book for children of all ages. Warm, friendly illustrations show and tell it isn't your child's fault, you still love him/her, healthy ways to handle anger, how your child is still safe and secure because the parents are in firm control of his/her world.
 
Let's Talk About It: Divorce by Fred Rogers; G P Putnam & Sons, 1996
For children of all ages . . . helpful information from the man children have come to trust.

Mom & Dad Don't Live Together Anymore by Kathy Stinson; Annick Press, 1985

($10) Our Family is Divorcing: A Read-Aloud Book for Families Experiencing Divorce by Patricia Johnson & Donna Williams; Resource Publications, 1996
For children of all ages . . . A story about a family going through divorce and how both the children and parents feel about what is happening. A great book for prompting discussion of children's feelings about what is happening in their family; includes a section with questions for discussion. May be read aloud to early primary school age children or older children (grades 3+) will be able to read the book themselves.
 
Two Homes to Live In: A Child's-Eye View of Divorce by Barbara S. Hazen; Human Sciences, 1978
Written from the child's viewpoint. Encourages communication between parent and child; shows that while divorce is a painful time, life becomes stable again and the child did not cause the divorce.
 
What's Going to Happen to Me? by Edna LeShan; Aladdin Books, 1978
Most kids are taken by surprise by divorce no matter how long they've known their parents have been unhappy. Some kids feel relieved to imagine the fighting will end, others feel guilty thinking they are to blame. Simple and direct suggestions for positive ways of coping for children.

Pre-teens & Teen-agers:

The Divorce Express by Paula Danziger; Laurel Leaf Books, 1982
Ninth-grader Phoebe must deal with her split-down-the-middle lifestyle. She shuttles back and forth from her weekdays with Dad to her weekends with Mom.
 
How it Feels When Parents Divorce by Jill Krementz; Knopf Publishing, 1988
Boys and girls, ages 7 to 16, share their experience of their parents' divorce. Children learn it is normal to feel shock, anger, confusion, and pain. Children discover ways to help themselves through this difficult time.
 
($10) How to Get it Together When Your Parents Are Coming Apart by Arlene Richards & Irene Willis; Willard Press, 1976
A great book for adolescents to help them understand the divorce process and how they may be affected by it. The authors cover the stages the parents may go through leading up to the divorce and the impact these stages may have on other family members. The book helps adolescents understand their feelings and what decisions they may want to discuss with their parents before any final arrangements are decided upon. The book also addresses many of the doubts adolescents may have about their own abilities to maintain relationships with significant others. Remarkably current information considering the mid-1970s publishing date.
 
It's Not the End of the World by Judy Blume; Dell
Easy to read novel about a 12-year-old who tries to get her parents back together. Once the divorce is final and the fighting ends, she and her brother and sister realize life is not so bad after all.

Parents:

Between Love & Hate by Lois Gold; Plenum Press, 1992
Civilized divorce: new roles and new rules; emotions of ending marriage; healing; helping children; parenting plans; handling conflict; difficult spouses.
 
($15) Caught in the Middle by Carla B. Garrity & Mitchell A. Baris; Lexington Books, 1994
Protecting children of high-conflict divorce. Includes: Why Work it Out?; Normal vs. Conflict Visitation; Identifying Parental Alienation; Parenting Plans for High-Conflict Divorce -- highly recommended.
 
Children of Divorce by Mitchell A. Baris & Carla B. Garrity; Blue Ridge Printing, 1988
Suggested responses to 1) child's refusal to be with a parent; 2) reactions of "I'm abandoned" or "I'm responsible" or "I'm not fitting in" or "It’s all your fault" or "I'm dropping out;" 3) child wants to change schedule. Addresses different rules, roles of step-parents, and long-distance parenting.
 
($10) Divorced Dad Dilemma by Gerald S. Mayer; Desert City Press, 1994
Men's responses to divorce, what impacts men's relationships with their children. Suggestions on staying connected to their children; coparenting with a former wife; being a man and providing nurturance, grieving well and letting go, being strong and offering tenderness.
 
($13) Does Wednesday Mean Mom's House or Dad's? by Marc Ackerman; John Wiley & Sons, 1997
Provides some guidelines to assist parents in finding effective means for "parenting apart," suggested strategies for helping children cope with divorce--both in the short term and for longer term, ideas for handling ongoing custody problems and disputes (without necessarily going back to court), and a list of custody do's and don'ts. An excellent practical book that addresses both children's needs and parental issues.
 
($11) Fighting Fair for Families by Fran Schmidt & Alice Friedman; Peace Education Foundation, 1989
Offers tools to handle conflict like a 'pro' and create a more loving and caring environment for you and your family. Cartoon illustrations.
 
For the Sake of the Children by Kris Kline & Stephen Pew; Prima Publishing, 1992
Communicating without condemning; breaking old habits; peaceful attendance at children’s' activities; avoiding pressure to start the old fight again; children speak out about their need to love both parents; recognizing when outside guidance is needed. Entertaining and insightful.
 
($20) Healthy Divorce by Craig Everett & Sandra V. Everett; Jossey-Bass, 1994
How to recognize and deal with different stages of divorce process; coping with anger, grief, and abandonment; forming new family relationships in step-families.
 
($12) Helping Children Cope with Divorce by Edward Teyber; Lexington Books, 1992
Putting children first; children's fears of abandonment, responsibility for the breakup, and reconciliation fantasies; parental conflict and cooperation; adverse consequences when father is unavailable; child-rearing after divorce; forming new family relationships in step-families.
 
($13) Helping Your Child Survive Divorce by Mary Ann Shaw
A manual to help parents respond to their children's questions and behaviors throughout the divorce process, including the years following a divorce. Uses real examples to illustrate appropriate and inappropriate responses to children's spoken and unspoken feelings.
 
Men on Divorce--Conversations with Ex-Husbands by Ellie Wymard; Hay House, 1994
Focuses on needs of children and 2 homes with no fighting; crisis periods; emotions; relating with the other parent; children's fears; parent's needs and style; when there is no other parent; long-distance parenting.
 
($12) Parents are Forever by Shirley Thomas; Springboard Publications, 1995
Easy to use, to-the-point guide helps children avoid terrible and unnecessary pain. How to solve common problems, divide parenting time, talk to children, deal with anger, avoid blame, and put children's needs first.
 
Second Chances by Judith Wallerstein & Sandra Blakeslee; Ticknor & Fields, 1989
Easy-to-read comprehensive account of the long-term emotional, economic, and psychological effects of divorce; differences between children who adjust well to divorce and children who have ongoing difficulty.
 
($5) Vicki Lansky's Divorce Book for Parents by Vicki Lansky; Signet, 1989
Practical, easy-to-understand, and on-target. Age-specific reactions of children and how to respond; "divorce speak;" shared parenting, keeping ex-spouses from being ex-parents; and long-distance parenting.

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